An old friend used to have an issue eating from certain cutlery. If the knife and fork felt funny he refused to use them. At home he had specific cutlery sets that were just for him. God knows how he managed in the real world, maybe he ate with his hands.
I used to think this was so strange but recently realised I also have things that if they don’t feel right cant be used. Most of the time I throw them in the bin, as long as no one is looking and I can get away with it, otherwise my husband will give me the death stare me for lobbing another “perfectly” fine thing in the trash. Even though in my world its not perfectly fine, it feels weird.
I don’t like drinking tea out of certain mugs, it tastes strange. Tea in a specific mug tastes better. Fact. I have thrown mugs in the bin if they don’t deliver a decent brew.
I also don’t like drinking water out of metal water bottles, I completely understand the drive for reusable cups etc and that they are great for the environment but plain water ends up tasting like an old copper pipe. I mean I’ve never licked the plumbing but if I had to take a guess it would be the same. Like pennies!
Trifle, oh no. Looks great and all the ingredients, if separate, are delicious but it is a taste and texture that I cannot come to terms with. Jelly, custard, sponge and cream. And of course we add sprinkles to make it more appealing. Wtf!
Then there is hard crusty lace, soft lace I love. My wedding dress was lace and it felt dreamy but anything with lace which is not soft can categorically go in the bin. Like labels, I used to infuriate my mum with ripping them out of every item of clothing I owned, as a result I made holes in almost everything which she would then have to sew all the ripped seams back together. I still remove them all to this day but with scissors as I cant be bothered to stitch everything back up! My son also has a dislike for labels. Awks.
Wool. Itchy scratchy wool. Why does it look so cosy but feels like a rake on your skin. It makes me grind my teeth. Ergh.
Tights. Oh my god. Why so tight. I can just about deal with the super thick ones for a couple of hours but other than that I just can’t cope with them. They go so high and are so full on, after a while I feel like I can’t breath and my toes are going to fall off. And when you’ve been sat down for too long they itch your bum cheeks like crazy, plus the sag at the crotch and constantly having to pull them up. Nope. Would rather have cold legs.
Socks. Ill-fitting socks to be more specific. Socks that ride down or don’t sit right around the toe area. My husband walks around with his socks inside out, back to front, the heel bit on TOP of his foot! It’s outrageous. And trainer socks, I know we are all being trendy with socks pulled up and on show but that pair of trainers socks that fails to do the only thing a trainer sock should do but yet comes off your heel. A sock slipping down inside your shoe is criminal. Bin!
Microfibers. We have hundreds of these brightly coloured squares around our house. They are great for car cleaning, window cleaning, wiping the lenses on our glasses, cleaning muddy paws but why do they feel like they cling to you? It’s like any tiny bit of dry or catchy skin and they velcro themselves to your hands.
Tea towels that don’t absorb water. Talk about missing the MVP. A tea towel can be used to help dry plates after washing up. They are not meant to smear the water around and leave everything just as wet as it was when you started. Then I’ve got wet hands so go to wipe them on said tea towel and because it doesn’t absorb water I still have wet hands, a puddle on the floor and wet socks now too. Excellent.
Finally, those little wooden spoons or forks that you get with a salad or at a coffee shop or to eat fish and chips with or with a mini pot of ice cream. These should all go in the bin. Running my rabbit teeth against one of these makes me want to pull my teeth out. I would rather use my hands than suffer a shit-uation where my tooth scrapes the spork. The same reason I cant eat chicken wings off the bone. I will revisit these bad boys when I have no teeth but for now they can go straight in the bin!
